Facebook and Twitter Friend Profiles

The complex human behavior was put on display with the new Facebook layout. The new interface that emulates microblogging tool Twitter, Facebook’s homepage now highlights an individual’s whereabouts or the lack of it. Now it’s not hard to notice how each and every Facebook friend behaves within the popular social networking site. Different personalities show up and I can’t help but poke fun at this observation. So here are the types of Facebook and Twitter friends meant just for fun.

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The Photo Poster Boy/Girl
This outgoing, extrovert friend is always in front of the camera. I think he or she is always surrounded by great travel attractions (including food on the table and luxury hotel bathrooms) or have all the chance to rub elbows with the VIPs all the time. Once the shooting is done, uploading to Facebook is almost always automatic. It’s always good to see this friend let us see the world for free on our desktop, but sometimes there’s too much unsaid words packed in a thousand photos.

The Quiz Addict
This friend is addicted to quizzes that sometimes it reaches to a point where he or she disrupts everyone in the network with banal and uninteresting results. How old will you get married? What’s the first letter of your crush? How well do you know me? Duh. This is one of the most annoying Facebook episodes I’ve encountered. Can I enroll this friend to an Advanced Algebra class and take all the quizzes as soon as possible? As if the Hide this Friend “your grade is F” feature is not enough to prevent this friend from being a repeater in class.

The Self-Centered Bozo Clowns
This is a friend who always post updates about himself/herself: I went shopping today, I went to the gym today, just tried my first yoga session at a posh/exclusive/you-can’t-beat-it location. S/he occasionally posts photos of — of course him/herself — at the beach, at the shopping mall carrying 7 paper bags, and other situations that make one envy. A classic Me, Myself and I scenario. This friend must have been neglected by parents as a kid and is now turns to Facebook friends for extra attention. Can you spend a moment to share something else aside from yourself? I think I know everything about you already.

The No-Shows
Whether these friends choose to hide behind the Facebook curtain or disallow me to view their updates, I’m not sure so I’d call them the no-shows. They compose bulk of of my Facebook friends online. I guess that’s how social networks normally function: there are 10% power users and 90% lurkers. Imagine if 100% of Facebook friends talk all the time. Still, it will be good to know how they’re doing or what they’re up to without sending them messages. But it leaves me asking, are these lurkers the opposite of the self-centered Bozos?

The Hatemonger
This friend must have woke up in the wrong side of bed every morning. Ever since I added this friend, I can only see complaints, hatred and occasional bad words spewed out of this person’s mind and translated into Facebook updates and Twitter tweets. This friend often signs up an online petition against the new Facebook layout, against fur coat makers, shark fin restaurants and many other mortals. Cheer up, mate!

The Unofficial Company Spokesperson
This friend occasionally shows up but his or her updates are hardly surprising. A new status that says, “[My Company] launches new product”, “Another testimonial from a beloved client on the greatness of the [My Company] product”, “I am so happy I worked for this [My Company]”. Maybe I’m wrong; they are official spokespersons.

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The Generous Friend
Social networking is about sharing, and this friend understands the concept; he/she is a sharer of good things. She or he shares links to stories that are interesting, provoke us to think, makes us laugh, and useful in our daily life. Unlike others who share boring photos or self-promoting yet tasteless links, this friend is a keeper, and I wish I have many more like him/her. The good thing about sharing is that it reveals hints of his/her likes, dislikes and probably gift ideas to give him/her on his/her wedding or birthday.

The Liker
This friend can’t seem to find the right word to write, and fear whatever he or she writes on someone’s status message can be used against him/her. So instead of posting comments, he or she signifies agreement on someone’s photos, links, or messages by clicking the “Like” button. “XMY Like This”… for little or no reason. This simple gesture is an indication of agreement with someone’s note, status, photo feed and the likes. And this friend uses it to let everyone know “I’m still logging in to my Facebook account”.

The Translate-My-Message-If-You-Can Friend
I have Facebook friends from Brazil, China, Sweden, Thailand and Italy. Some of them occasionally write in their own language, which is perfectly fine. But I realized there are also those who don’t post English messages at all. If I am interested and have time, I’d do a Google Translate and learn more. But most of the time it’s always easy to do a “who cares” shrug and move on to the next message. Maybe I’ll only have myself to blame for adding this friend whom I have difficulty in communicating with.

Photo credits: jenniferkuhn, BustedTees